Just like how God knows how to push our buttons to move us to do and think positively, Satan knows how to poke and prod at our nerves to make us do and think negatively.
He makes us forget that God will make all of His promises and goodness clear within His own timing. He has a plan for our life, with meaningful and necessary timing worthy of our patience:
"He has made everything beautiful in its time..." -Ecclesiastes 3:11
Regardless of if it applies to being alone in a romantic sense or in a friendship sense, eternal loneliness is what I've deemed to be the "big fat lie" Satan places in our mindsets. God is always with us and is always leading us down a path He has created especially for us, yet Satan is really skilled at planting thoughts of inadequacy and isolation into our brains. Next time you sense Satan placing one of these feelings of loneliness into your life, take note:
Life with God = Life without Loneliness
Not going to lie to you all, though, that is a concept much easier said than done. Nights sitting alone, school dances without a date, exclusion from social invitations, and other experiences people might have in this category seem to only encourage the "big fat lie". The physical loneliness makes it easy to forget that we are never alone spiritually. Feeling the hurt of being excluded or uninvited can make us feel unworthy of love and can make it seem that God doesn't have a significant other or friendships in our plan.
There are a lot of smaller elements that lead to difficulty with accepting, believing, and trusting Christ's truth that He has plans for our futures in relationships. Here is just a short list of the mini-lies that play into Satan's "forever alone" trap, in no particular order, along with some of God's word to counter them:
Mini-lie 1:
I must have misunderstood God or He lied to me. He placed a desire for a significant other, a future family, or a friend in my heart with no intention to actually fulfill that promise.
Response:
"Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and your dominion endures through all generations. The Lord is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made." -Psalm 145:13
Mini-lie 2:
There is no chance for me to meet someone. My life has no opportunities for positive friendships and relationships to develop.
Response:
In Matthew 15:29-39, Jesus fed four thousand, while in a remote location with no access to additional food, from seven loaves of bread and a few small fish. "They all ate and were satisfied. Afterward the disciples picked up seven basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over."
From this story, we can clearly see that Christ can make anything possible!
Mini-lie 3:
I'm too old and missed the boat. Everyone has their friends and relationships developed so there is no hope for me.
Response:
In Genesis 21:1-7, the Lord blessed Sarah with pregnancy in her old age. Her husband Abraham was a hundred years old! "'Sarah said, "God has brought me laughter, and everyone who hears about this will laugh with me." And she added, "Who would have said to Abraham that Sarah would nurse children? Yet I have borned him a son in his old age."
From this story, we can clearly see that Jesus doesn't place an age limit on finding love and having a family.
Mini-lie 4:
I am not strong enough in faith, not educated enough, not attractive enough, etc. for anyone to want to spend time with me. I'm essentially inadequate and undeserving of love.
Response:
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." -Psalm 139:13-14
...and...
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity." -1 Timothy 4:12
From these verses, we can clearly see that Christ has created all of us with beauty and care. He intends for us to be valued, no matter how young/old, skilled/unskilled, or weak/strong we might feel.
Mini-lie 5:
I am too shy to even talk to people. How am I going to fall in love, let alone form meaningful friendships, if I can't even hold a conversation?
Response:
"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." -Philippians 4:13
That's just a short list of all of the related issues that can tie into the "big fat lie". If you cannot personally relate, I think it is fairly safe to say that you will meet someone with these thoughts or have already met someone with these feelings.
With that in mind, remember that God placed a desire for intimacy, acceptance, and companionship as a model for how He wants to relate to us. God will always be our companion, our life partner, and our supporter. His grace and love are endless.
Seeking Him is the perfect way to learn how to love and how to see ourselves the way He sees us. Pursuing Christ not only gives us contentment in our present scenario, but also in the future to come:
"For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come." -1 Timothy 4:8
Take a moment to realize your value and acceptance with Christ, as well as the importance of seeking a relationship with Him before pursuing relationships with others. You are never alone, as long as you accept Jesus into your life.
Let Jesus worry about your love story and friendships. Keep yourself open to hear His guidance and He will lead you down paths you never could have imagined on your own.
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